I have been working with a client for the past few months that is an alcoholic. Most of it has been great. He is a very honest person, always lets me know where he stands, and doesn't give me a lot of bull shit or excuses for his behavior. I appreciate all of that.
When he first started coming to HELP of Ojai again, he straight up told me he had no intention of stopping drinking. He had tried all the programs and hated them, he had tried cold turkey before, he had managed to stay sober for a few months one time, but when it was said and done he wasn't going to stop drinking. We set goals dealing with other issues and talked about the consequences of him
showing up to the office drunk. Although he missed a few appointments and got stuck in other cities twice, he always reappeared and worked towards his other goals.
One day he came in and said he stopped drinking cold turkey. Although I was incredibly proud of him for his decision, it's also very dangerous for your body to go through withdraw and you should be under medical care to help manage side effects. Every time he came in the entire office congratulated him on a job well done. He was staying sober through a lot of pain, we were impressed. He was putting his ego aside and acknowledging the struggles he was going through. He was turning down alcohol at the place he was staying, making decisions to leave the house early to not be tempted. We made follow-up doctor's appointments, continued to talk about his other goals, and planned for his upcoming probation hearing.
He told me if he got probation, he would opt to go to jail for the 60 days. I 100% agreed and prayed that he would get 60 days in jail. That would have been 60 days of not sleeping on the streets or in a place that was covered in temptation. That would have been 60 days away from all his friends that did nothing to encourage his soberness. That would have been 60 days where he could have focused on himself. I never thought I would pray so much for someone to go to jail.
18 days. That's how long he lasted sober. He thought he was going to jail and had a drink with breakfast. I tried to hide my disappointment on my face and tell him how much I appreciate his honesty. My heartbreaks when I see how he is acting differently. The neuro cognitive problems that alcoholism causes are present. We have a brief chat, as I know he can't handle a lot at that moment. We continue to keep our doctor's appointments for this week. I find myself adding on prayers of not
only strength and healing for him, but ones of memory and not drinking before the appointment. I rack my brain for what I could have done better as a case manager and make notes for next time. I research all that I can about alcoholism and neuro cognitive function. I gently remind myself that I am not the choice maker, this is not about me. My disappointment and heartbreak is for me, while my positivity, tough love, and encouragement are for him.
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